There are a lot of titles that get thrown around in leadership — boss, manager, supervisor, captain, director.
They all sound fine on a business card.
But there’s one word that, when done right, carries more power than any title in the org chart: Coach.
A Coach — Done Right
When it’s done right, Coach might be one of the greatest words in the English language.
A real coach is a mentor.
A guide.
A believer.
A challenger.
A mirror.
A friend when you need strength — a leader when you need direction — a supporter when your own belief flickers or fails.
A great coach sees more in you than you see in yourself — and shows you how to see it too.
A great coach helps you find pathways you didn’t even know were there.
A great coach helps you overcome the obstacles you can see — and the ones you can’t.
A great coach doesn’t just demand your best — they help draw it out of you.
They become a launch point. A compass. A target to aim for — even if they’re not perfect.
They give you belief that the system you’re in can lead to success — and that you have what it takes to make it work.
And whether they know it or not — a true coach operates straight out of the Rogerian playbook: support, belief, connection, and unconditional positive regard.
The Rogerian principle comes from Carl Rogers, one of the founders of humanistic psychology.
He believed that the most powerful thing you can offer another person isn’t advice or instruction — it’s what he called unconditional positive regard.
In practice, this means fully accepting and supporting someone without judgment, so they feel safe enough to open up, grow, and reach their potential.
This approach builds trust and connection at a biological level — which is exactly what great coaches do, whether they know it or not.
What a Coach Is Not
Too many people wear the word Coach on their shirt — but what they really mean is Controller.
Yeller.
Screamer.
Demanding.
Abrasive.
Abrupt.
Self-interested.
You know the type.
They lead with fear.
They think barking orders is strength.
They think intimidation is authority.
And here’s what they don’t understand — something science has proven time and time again:
You can’t threaten greatness out of people.
When your nervous system senses a threat — when your leader’s unpredictable, harsh, or self-serving — your system closes up.
Fight, flight, or freeze.
Creativity vanishes.
Teamwork collapses.
Connection fractures.
The yeller might get short-term compliance. But they never get true commitment.
They never get loyalty. They never build trust.
The Coach Who Got It Right — Mike Dailey
I’ve been coached by people on both sides of this dynamic — on the field, in TV production, in broadcasting, in business, even inside my own companies.
I’ve seen what works — and what breaks teams apart.
One of the best examples of a coach who got it right was my coach Mike Dailey. Coach D was the Head Coach of our world Champion Albany Firebirds team.
I talk about Mike in Every Day Great because he’s the gold standard for what leadership can look like.
Mike Dailey was tough — don’t get me wrong. He had standards. He had demands.
But underneath it all, he truly cared about his guys.
He communicated.
He connected.
He was a human being not just a coach.
He had a way of letting you know he saw you — and because you felt seen, you wanted to go the extra mile for him.
Mike Dailey understood the truth most so-called leaders miss:
When your people want to win for you — because they know you’d go to battle for them — you build something unstoppable.
Coach D knew how to give a hard truth when you needed it — but you knew it came from a place of wanting you to succeed.
He could challenge you and support you.
He built connection and accountability.
He was thoughtful and passionate- a mix that’s hard to get right.
He made you believe the system would work — and that you were good enough to win inside it.
It’s why I still love him today and all of my teammates feel the same.
He wasn’t perfect. No coach is. But he cared — and that made all the difference.
The Cost of Getting It Wrong
I’ve also had the other kind — the controller, the screamer, the self-important critic who shows up when it’s easy to point a finger and disappears when you need support.
Those leaders break teams.
They build dysfunction.
They allow pettiness, selfishness, blame.
They hide when they should be leading.
They talk behind people’s backs instead of showing integrity and grit.
They suffocate the connection that makes real success possible.
When people feel unsafe — they play small.
When they feel unsupported — they protect themselves instead of each other.
When they don’t believe the system is fair — they stop giving their best to it.
What Great Coaches — and Great Leaders — Do
Whether you’re a coach, a boss, or a leader of any kind — you have a choice.
You can be the coach who creates fear — or the coach who creates belief.
You can be the coach who breaks connection — or the coach who builds it.
You can be the coach who hides behind your title — or the coach who stands shoulder-to-shoulder with your team and shows them what’s possible.
A great coach empowers.
A great coach connects.
A great coach holds people accountable to their promises — because people want to deliver for them.
That’s the secret: the best teams want to serve and win for a great coach.
A great coach creates an environment where people stretch beyond what they think is possible — and they do it willingly.
The Best Word in the English Language
Coach.
Done right — it’s not just a word.
It’s a promise.
A responsibility.
A gift you give the people who trust you to lead them.
If you lead — be worthy of that word.
Do it the right way.
Do it the way Mike Dailey did it.
Do it the way the best teams need it.
Leave your legacy in the confidence and success you bring to the people you lead.
Create future leaders that want to model your style to help others.
And watch how far your people will run for you — and with you.
Lead well. Coach well. Stay great.
About Mike Pawlawski:
Mike Pawlawski is an 11-year professional quarterback, world champion athlete, award-winning TV producer, trusted keynote speaker, and best-selling author of Every Day Great: The Playbook for Winning at Everything. He’s the co-founder of the High Achieving Teams Playbook, helping elite athletes and leadership teams build world-class trust, connection, and results. Mike’s mission is to equip people and organizations with the mindset, systems, and culture to perform at their highest level — under pressure, through change, together.
If you want to learn how to lead and coach at this level, check out my book Every Day Great or bring me in for our High Achieving Teams Playbook. Let’s build a culture that performs under pressure — and grows together.
